Dumbass Slogans: “Elevate Your Drive”

Toyota recently unveiled a new slogan: “Elevate your drive.” Toyota wants you to elevate your drive. Okay sure, I’m willing to do that, but first I need to know what the hell that even means. I know Toyota is a Japanese company, but their American slogans should use proper grammar. Unless you’re referring to golf, I have no idea what it means to “elevate my drive.” I’m not sure how leasing a Toyota Corolla helps to elevate drive. Unless it comes with horny goat weed to elevate my sex drive I don’t know how that’s supposed to make sense. Unless the car has Inspector Gadget capability where springs rise out of the top of the wheels and raise the chassis of the car twenty feet in the air I have no idea how this slogan makes any sense. Young people these days are having enough trouble speaking English with all the memes and hashtags in the world, the last thing we need is advertisers using poor grammar too. If advertisers agreed to use proper English then they could claim to be contributing at least one positive in today’s world as opposed to the usual zero. If the phrase “elevate your drive” makes you want to buy a car then there’s a good chance you shouldn’t even be allowed behind the wheel of an automobile.

It sounds like they want people to drive while they're high.

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