Ask McFartnuggets: “How Does A Court Swear In A Witness With No Arms?”

No one can lie with their hand raised.
Dear McFartnuggets: 
In a court of law how would they get a witness with no arms to swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help them god if they have no arm to raise up? -- Betty from Pennsylvania

Dear Betty:
I believe they would just make them swear to god and take the oath without raising a hand just out of practicality. That being said, I think that’s bullshit. Obviously, there’s something important about raising your right arm otherwise we wouldn’t have to do it. So for someone with no arms should have to raise their leg and foot. If you have no arms you likely use your feet the way an armed person uses their hands so they’re basically your hands. That means any truth power your hand would have is then transferred down to your foot. It may be a little weird to see a guy or gal take their shoe off and raise their leg up as high as they can while saying “I do!” But that’s really the only way to ensure they tell the truth. If there’s not a limb in the air, there’s always a doubt. Why do you think they make your raise the hand to begin with? For fun?! Clearly there must be a reason. I would hate to think the entire court system is a compilation of redundant and arbitrary traditions that serve no actual purpose!

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