The Top 5 Most Annoying Things Parents Say

"Stop peeing on my head!"

Without parents none of us would be here right now. We owe a lot to our parents, but that doesn’t keep them from being annoying sometimes. As much as we love our parents there are always those things they say because they know it’s going to piss you off. Here are the top 5 most commonly said and annoying phrases you hear from your parents:

5. “Can you do your own laundry this week?”

Really? Can I do my own laundry THIS week? How about giving me a 2 week notice before dropping a bombshell like that on me! I have plans to sit around eating Cheetos all day and playing with myself I can’t be doing laundry all the damn time.

4. “When are you and your wife going to move out?”

Usually your father will say this in reference to you and your blowup doll. He thinks it’s funny, but I’m not laughing.

3. “Stop eating all of our expensive chocolates.”

How about you find a better hiding spot for them? I’m not 4-years-old anymore. I can reach on top of the refrigerator, stupid!

2. “We think you might have a problem with alcohol.”

What they really mean is they have a problem with your problem. Take it up with my problem, not with me. I’d tell you where to reach him, but I don’t believe he exists!

1. “You are our biggest regret.”

This one hurts the first time you hear it. After that initial shockwave it just becomes the annoying catchphrase your parents always say when they’re out to dinner with them at Ruby Tuesday’s and you’re exhibiting your “problem with alcohol.”