Ask McFartnuggets: “What Is The Purpose Of Eyebrows?”

I think you mean,
"Why do people have eyebrow?"
Dear McFartnuggets: Why do people have eyebrows? Seriously? What is the point?  -- Gilbert from Tahoma

Dear Gilbert:
There really is no good purpose for eyebrows, Gilbert. One could argue they’re on our face so we can show more emotion, but when was the last time you figured out how someone was feeling based on their eyebrows? Usually there are much more obvious ways to tell. If someone’s sad you can tell because they’re crying or if they’re angry you can tell because they’re red and strangling you. You don’t need eyebrows for that is what I’m saying.  Maybe back in the day when cavemen had fat ass eyebrows that hung over the eyeball, the eyebrows acted like shields from rain like a second head of hair, but those days are over (for most of us).

The way I see it, eyebrows are just annoyances that can be accidentally left at the scene of an accident to later link you to it by DNA. That’s why I play it safe and wax my eyebrows completely off and just draw them in with Sharpie. One day I think I’ll get a permanent tattoo. Something cool though like snakes or swords or something.

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