Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Do I Get Mourning Wood?”

Grief is a confusing emotion.
Dear McFartnuggets:
I told my doctor I get “mourning wood” and he said that’s totally normal. I know it’s not though. It can’t be! Why do I get this? What’s wrong with me? -- Dante from Washington

Dear Dante:
Your doctor probably thought you meant “morning wood” which IS normal. What you are referring to is something completely different. “Mourning wood” is the act of getting excited at funerals and you’re right, it’s not normal. That doesn’t mean it’s completely bad though. As long as you aren’t hurting anyone to get your mourning wood then I don’t see what the problem is, aside from possibly ruining a few funerals and wakes. Mourning the dead is an important process in life. Some people deal with it differently than others and you have to let other people recognize and understand that. Personally, I would recommend wearing really baggy MC Hammer pants. People might consider that a little disrespectful, but it’s a lot better than them seeing your mourning wood!

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