Ask McFartnuggets: “Who Is Binkie McFartnuggets?”

My favorite activity is
"Just chillin"
Dear McFartnuggets:
Who are you? I know it's such a simple question, but there's so many different ways to answer it. I'm pretty sure that everyone has a story of some sort; so what's yours? -- Ashley from Florida

Dear Ashley:
That is a good question. Some people think Binkie McFartnuggets is a hoax perpetrated by the government for a yet unknown purpose. I can assure that accusation is false. Who is Binkie McFartnuggets? That’s almost like asking “Who is the wind?” If I could choose one word to describe myself it would be “mysterious” and I would delve into that in greater detail, but then it would cease to be true. However, since you did ask the question I will do my best to answer it.

Let’s start with the basics. I am what appears to be a human with male genitalia who considers himself a “man” even though many do not. I call these people “haters”. Mad people be hating these days. I think the main thing that defines me in this world is that I do not hate. I may dislike countless things, but I do not hate. Does this make me better than others? In a way, yes, but perhaps in time the world will learn the errors of their ways. Until then I will be here to talk about it on this blog and post weird old commercials I found in my grandpa’s basement on YouTube. Really I’m just a guy who has unconventional views on life and normally that would be a bad thing, but in today’s ass backwards world I’m not ashamed. That’s why I’m here. I’m here to share my ideas and lend support to the few people who think the way I do. Thanks for the question, Ashley!

Send your questions to PizzaTesticles@yahoo.com and I will try to answer them!

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