Ask McFartnuggets: “Is Food Waste Really a Big Deal?”

Dear McFartnuggets: 

I read that 40% of all food in America ends up in the garbage which ends up being worth around 165 billion dollars annually. People are really outraged about that, but the other 60% ends up in the toilet in the form of human shit. What’s the price tag on all that food turned into human shit? Either way it’s going to become waste! That’s what we do with food, we turn it into waste. People talk about how much methane leaks into the atmosphere when we throw out food. Newsflash! Feces has a lot of methane in it too! Does it really matter how we turn the food into waste? -- Cedric from Baltimore, Maryland

Dear Cedric:

You’re right, it’s all going to become shit one way or another, so why not let people get some use out of it? The real issue is not food waste, it’s feeding the starving. If we can give starving people our extra food before it turns into waste so they can turn it into their own waste then that’s what people should be doing. As far as the methane aspect, most sewage treatment plants burn off the methane produced there to help power the plant so you don’t have to worry about added methane emissions if that 40% of food was eaten and converted into human dookie. The price of feeding people that 165 billion a year of wasted food wouldn’t have a price actually, to those people it would be priceless.

Is it really wasted food if hobos are eating it out of dumpsters?

Write your questions to PizzaTesticles@yahoo.com and please be patient I’ve had a spike in questions lately. I appreciate your understanding!