Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Does Garfield Hate Mondays So Much?”

James A. Garfield probably
hated Mondays too.
Dear McFartnuggets: 
How come Garfield the cat hates Mondays so much? He ain’t got no job he gotta drag his orange ass to every morning. He don’t even like the weekends that much. You never see him out at nightclubs getting crunk and poppin’ Molly grinding on hos. If he don’t love weekends how can he hate Mondays? Shit don’t make sense! -- Ty from Cali

Dear Ty:
There are plenty of reasons for Garfield to hate Mondays. He’s unemployed. He probably feels a little crappy when he sees people going to work every Monday. He is a fat lazy cat, but part of him somewhere must resent being such a sloth. Then Jon goes to work so he doesn’t have his friend there. That’s usually when all his hijinx ensues, but you have to believe he misses Jon when he leaves which is typical pet behavior. I think a possible solution for Garfield’s hatred of Mondays would be to make Monday lasagna night. If that were the case it would be very difficult for Garfield to hate Mondays with such lacrimony.

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