Ask McFartnuggets: "Why Does My Girlfriend's Vagina Taste Like Battery Acid?"

Your genitals should never taste
like the Rio Tinto.
Dear McFartnuggets: I was going to the circus on my girlfriend's private parade the other day when I discovered that it tasted like battery acid. Why does this happen? Why the heck does my girlfriend's vagina taste like battery acid? -- Wilbur from Maryland

Dear Wilbur:
First of all how the hell do you know what battery acid tastes like? Have you eaten battery acid before? That's very unsafe. I don't know why people are so ready to describe a flavor as "battery acid". Is eating batteries a common thing that I missed out on? As far as I know battery acid is corrosive and will destroy your insides. Will your girlfriend's vagina? Probably not. If her vagina is tasting strange that's usually a sign that she's not keeping it as clean as she should. Then again who is to say what tastes strange when it comes to licking genitals. What tastes like acid to you might taste like cotton candy and dreams to some hobo on the street. If she cleans up her act and it still tastes foul then that might just be a sign you're not meant to be together.

Send your questions to PizzaTesticles@yahoo.com and stop eating batteries.  

1 comment :

  1. I can't say this from personal experience but I believe that there is acid in pee? I think it's uric acid (sounds like urine, right?). Perhaps that's what you're tasting. It could be that she went to the girls' room and didn't wipe herself quite as diligently as she might. It's an easy oversight to make ...

    I've never actually heard of this phenomenon before, and I've heard lots and read loads of books about sex. Did you mention it to her? Perhaps you should. As mentioned above, this could be a hygiene issue and if it is then she should take better care. Negligence in personal cleanliness can lead to infections and all sorts of problems.