6.12.2014

The Top 5 Best Unexpected Gifts To Give To A Homeless Person

A lot of homeless people
will be very weary of strange
gifts. They have to trust you.
Most gifts to a homeless person are unexpected, but that doesn’t mean you can’t go even more unexpected. The best gifts are unexpected so why give a homeless person something that they could predict like a sandwich or soap? Why not leave a real lasting impression on them with a crazy out of left field gift that is still incredibly useful? Here are the top 5 best unexpected gifts to give to a homeless person:


5. Cat
Homeless people always have dogs, but what homeless person ever has a cat? No one’s going to see that coming! A lot of homeless people have dogs because dogs will love them no matter what. A cat’s love has to be earned, like that of a woman. In a best case scenario, the cat would be like Helen Hunt in “As Good As It Gets” and force the hobo to want to be a better man.

How could having a little kitten like that not brighten anyone's day?


4. Condoms
Most homeless people don’t bother to use condoms when they have sex which is a big mistake. Being homeless is probably bad enough without having STDs to worry about and a new mouth to feed. When you hand a homeless person a box of condoms people are going to look at you weird, but it is a useful gift.

There are so many fun things to do with condoms and I'm not even counting intercourse.


3. Poncho
When it rains you might get to go home and snuggle up next to a fireplace, but a hobo doesn’t have that option. Give them a poncho to protect them from the rain. Why not?

Just because you don't have a house doesn't mean you can't look stylish.


2. Dildo
A dildo is always an awkward gift to give anyone. However, it is solid gift because even if the homeless person doesn’t plan to use it for self pleasure it can also be used as a hand-to-hand combat weapon which can help them fend off harassers. Think about it, are you going to mess with someone swinging a shit covered dildo at you? I don’t think so.

Even if you don't use a dildo for traditional purposes it can still serve as a magic wand.


And the number one most unexpected gift to give a homeless person is a…


1. Drum set
A lot of homeless people make money by playing the drums, but they usually play on plastic buckets. Think abut how much better they would sound on a real drum kit! And even if the hobo doesn’t know how to play, give them drums anyway and let them learn. You’ve gotta start somewhere!

Drumming is a decent way for a homeless person to make some money.

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