Ask McFartnuggets: “If Time Flies When You’re Having Fun Why Would Anyone Want a Long Life?”

Dear McFartnuggets: 

People are always talking about having a long, drawn out, prosperous life and yet we’ve all heard the saying “Time flies when you’re having fun.” Well which is it? Because as we all know, time doesn’t stop, so if you lived a long life then by definition, time did not fly, therefore your overall life could not be considered fun. If the idea is to have fun then the happiest would be those who die soonest and have the seemingly shortest lives. If people want to live long they should avoid fun. Am I right or wrong? -- Nyisha from Blue Ridge, Georgia

Dear Nyisha:

I'm not really sure what you're talking about. The key thing to remember about time is that while it flies when you’re having fun it can also fly when you’re not having fun. In other words, fun is not imperative to time flying. I'm sure time seems to have flied for elderly people since they lose most of their memories which are mental checkpoints that help you interpret time elapsed. So to most super old people, time probably did fly. Also, just because you died as a baby doesn't mean you had a blast the whole time. Your life may have flied by but that's not fun at all. Anyone who's lost a child can tell you that! Basically the idea that time flies when you're having fun is extremely flawed so don't let that dictate how you live your life.

Time also flies when you're in a coma.

Send your questions to PizzaTesticles@yahoo.com