Dumbass Sayings: “To Hell in a Handbasket”

Sometimes you’re standing in line at a 7-11 witnessing a dispute between the cashier and someone who appears to be high on bath salts and someone else in line turns to you and says “This country is going to hell in a handbasket.” How’s that? I understand that’s a bad thing because we’re going to hell, but why is the method of transport a factor? Personally, I’d think a handbasket might be a nice cozy way to get to hell. I’d much prefer a handbasket over say a demon’s ballsack or a giant pus filled Satanic ass wart, which could conceivably be ways to be sent to hell. I mean it’s not like there’s any proof of which are acceptable ways to be delivered to hell and which aren’t so we’re basically free to dream up whatever transports we can think of, and you choose handbaskets and handcarts as the worst? How about a spiked cage full of rotting corpses? I wasn’t even trying on that one and it’s way worse than a handbasket. Plus, a whole country can’t fit in a handbasket. Is that why it’s such a bad mode of transport? Because if that’s the case then you can always go smaller. If being cramped is the reason it’s such a bad thing then why not say we’re going to hell in a fanny pack? A fanny pack is smaller than a hand basket. Basically this doesn’t make sense.

The only way this makes sense is if you assume the basket will burn up before you've reached the bottom of hell, in which case the fall will hurt, but you're going to be in extreme pain regardless.

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