Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Are Food Serving Sizes on Nutrition Facts So Small?”

Dear McFartnuggets: 
Have you ever noticed how food serving sizes on the nutrition facts of food are so damn small? A serving size of Oreos is like two or three cookies. Who the hell only eats two or three Oreos in a single sitting? I eat eight before I even sit down to start a serving! Who makes this stuff up? Is there some kind of underground secret society of midgets that runs the world and makes these tiny serving sizes just to fuck with us? I can’t understand what is going on here! When are we gonna get some serving sizes that are suitable for full sized people? -- Kim from Atlanta, Georgia

Dear Kim:
First off, the politically correct term is not “midget” it’s “Individuals of a height not exceeding 5 foot 3.” And no, I doubt they have a secret society that clandestinely controls the world. I could be wrong on that, but if I am then I’ll have plenty of company. I believe the reason you see such small serving sizes is because those are the recommended limit of cookies you should eat in a day. Most foods these days are packed with fat, cholesterol, and sodium and we enjoy them because they taste good. Unfortunately, our bodies have not yet evolved to consume insane amounts of fat and cholesterol and not die of a heart attack or stroke so we have to try and limit that intake as much as possible. That’s where the serving sizes come in. People have gotten a lot fatter these days too so maybe in 1920, three Oreos would have been seen as a feast whereas today they’re already stuffed into your mouth all at the same time before your brain even realizes you’ve opened the package.

Pictured: 1/100th of a serving of broccoli.

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