Dumbass Sayings: “Nothing Good Ever Happens After 2 A.M.”

When you come home after a night at the emergency room where you were treated for an arm gash you got in a broken beer bottle fight with a bath salts zombie at 3:30 AM, your mother always says “Nothing good ever happens after 2 AM!” This is one of those sayings that doesn’t really make sense when you examine it. Nothing good ever happens AFTER 2 AM? So does that mean only good things can happen in the two hour span between Midnight and 2 AM? That actually encourages people to go out late by creating a brief window of time where good things can happen so people will try to be out at midnight and keep pushing it hard til 2 AM which would definitely result in bad things. You do know what once midnight happens that’s a new day and the day lasts until the next midnight, right? Of course good things happen after 2 AM! For example, lots of good things happen at 5 PM when work generally stops for the day, and in case you were wondering, 5 PM is after 2 AM. How would you explain that?

I’ve even heard a dumber version of this that goes “Nothing good ever happens after midnight.” This is obviously even more pessimistic than the 2 AM version because it proposes the idea that nothing good EVER happens. Of course people who say this aren’t big party animals, they’re clearly a bummer.

It doesn't matter what time it is, if you're doing business with Peruvian drug lords, nothing good will ever happen.

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