Ask McFartnuggets: “How Soon After Midnight Can You Feed A Mogwai?”

Dear McFartnuggets: 
You’re not supposed to feed a mogwai after midnight, but how long do you have to wait after midnight to feed one? -- Babs from Staten Island, New York

Dear Babs:
Actually I don’t think you’re allowed to feed them ever. Technically it’s always “after midnight.” Think about it. When is ever NOT after midnight? Midnight is the absolute earliest part of a day so any given point during a day is after midnight. I think that’s why you rarely ever see mogwais. Thanks to responsible owners they all starved to death and we don’t have to deal with any of that metamorphosis into disgusting gremlins nonsense.

Who the hell do people think they are telling mogwai when they can and can't eat? If you said that about women you'd really get some backlash.

Send me your questions to PizzaTesticles@yahoo.com

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