Ask McFartnuggets: “Is It Okay For Adult Dwarfs To Fight Kids?”

Dwarves may be a warrior
race, but that doesn't give
them the right to beat kids.
Dear McFartnuggets: 
While driving past the local park the other day I saw a group of children who couldn’t be older than 11 in a fist fight with an adult dwarf. It happened so fast that I couldn’t really process what I saw until now. Now that I’m thinking about it, I’m wondering is it actually okay for an adult dwarf to fight kids? I mean he was actually smaller than they were so it’s not the same as a King sized person fighting a bunch of kids. Also it was like three or four kids so it seemed like an even brawl to me at the time. I’m asking is it okay? Did I do the right thing by not intervening? -- Marisol from Texas

Dear Marisol:
First off, Marisol they’re not called “Dwarfs” they’re called “Individuals of limited vertical stature.” Second, no it’s never okay for an adult to be hitting kids. It doesn’t matter what their size. I don’t care if you’re one of those people who have that non-aging disease and have the body of infants, you still can’t attack children even if the children are beating you up first. It’s an adults responsibility to run away from children who are trying to beat them up. If I actually stood toe to toe with kids who attacked me I’d be in prison now. I don’t see why an individual of limited vertical stature should get that right and I shouldn’t.

Thanks for all the questions and keep them coming to PizzaTesticles@yahoo.com

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