5.24.2014

Dumbass Sayings: “Dropping The F-Bomb”

When people see an
H-Bomb their instinct
is to drop an F-Bomb.
Whenever you accidentally scream “Fuck!” during your child's school play everyone talks about how you “Dropped the F-Bomb.” Is it that serious, folks? Is this F-word so serious that you have to equate it with the destructive impact of air-to-ground ordnance? This is a horrible metaphor to use for a few reasons. First off, you never want to use this saying around Japanese people who had family that was involved in Hiroshima or Nagasaki. That’s very insulting. I’m sure they wish someone dropped an F-Bomb on them instead of an A-Bomb. Secondly, if I’m dropping this “F-bomb” then that means that I’m already high up in an aircraft of prestige and prominence and anyone who is hurt by what I drop on them is of no concern to me. My dropping of F-bombs is my way of exhibiting air supremacy. If you’re insulted by the F-bomb then you’re nothing but collateral damage in the war for me being able to express myself without social limitations on my vocabulary. If you’re that worried about the F-Bomb, before I say it I’ll scream loud like a siren to give you enough time to Duck and Cover under a desk. That would be appropriate considering we all know what Duck rhymes with.

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