Ask McFartnuggets: “Why Can’t I Capture Unconscious Pokemon?”

"I just caught me a Snorlax!"
Dear McFartnuggets: 
How come in the Pokemon video game you can only catch Pokemon when they have a little energy left? Why can’t you just knock them out completely and capture them after the battle is over? I should be able to just go up to the unconscious Pokemon and throw the pokeball at them to capture them at that point unless they’re dead. If they’re dead though then that’s crazy because that means every Pokemon I beat and don’t capture is killed. That means I go around killing thousands of Pokemon leaving them dead in the grass just so that my Pokemon can get stronger by killing them. I don’t want to believe that’s true. That would make Pokemon masters like Pokemon Hitlers. That would make me feel really bad. So why can’t I capture unconscious Pokemon? Some people say that you can’t capture unconscious pokemon because then they won’t respect you after when they wake up. Personally, I don’t see how capturing them right before they’re knocked out is any better than capturing them while they’re fully comatose. You could just leave them in the pokeballs an extra few weeks and let them cool off in there for awhile. I don’t get it.-- Allison from Evansville, Indiana

Dear Allison:
The real reason you can’t capture unconscious pokemon is because then you wouldn’t even need to engage in pokebattles or use pokeballs, you could just sneak up behind them and hit them over the head with an iron pipe and just throw them in a potato sack. That’s just wrong. That’s not what being a Pokemon master is about. Thanks for the question!

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