5). Dress up like a chicken. - Get a chicken costume and walk around like you normally would asking people where they're from. When they start to get boring, cluck right in their face.
4). Hire a clown. - Hiring a clown seems like something you'd only do for kids' parties, but you can also pay a clown to come to adult parties and just hang out looking creepy. Tell him to stand in the corner staring at everyone. That usually adds a nice element of confusion and gets people talking to each other saying things like "Oh my god that clown is scaring me!" and "Who invited the clown?" It becomes like a mystery game. Just make sure to check the clown's background on Angie's List first so it doesn't turn out to be like a "Clue" murder mystery.
3). Replace the apples in the apple bobbing tub with dildos. - Bobbing for apples is pretty lame, but when you substitute in rubber dildos it becomes a way more entertaining thing to watch. It's best if only women participate in this to avoid a weird vibe. If you can, get the clown to participate.
2). Spray everyone with a fire hose. - This will require a fire engine and could be a little dangerous, but there's no doubt that blasting everyone with a fire hose will wake people up. This might not be the best thing to do if you're White the party has a lot of African American people at it though. Just a warning. I know we don't like to acknowledge this type of thing and it's not part of your initial thought process, but when people look back they might think you were being racist.
1). Spike the punch with bath salts. - I don't necessarily condone this step, but there's no disputing that it will certainly liven up the festivities. What once was a lame party in an instant can turn into the most amazing zombie themed face-eating bonanza ever.