If you've ever been to
one funeral you've been to them all. They're always the same, a bunch
of people wearing black crying during the day. That's why when I have my
funeral it's going to be at NIGHT. Why not? Some people are
superstitious, they think that the corpse needs to be buried before
sundown or else the spirit will be trapped in purgatory for all of
eternity, blah blah blah, whatever.
I'm more concerned with people
having a good time at my funeral and everyone knows all the best parties
happen at night. Sure it might be a little creepy to be standing out in
a graveyard in the dark, especially if there's a sociopathic
gravekeeper roaming out there offended by the idea of a night funeral,
but to me that just adds to the excitement. Maybe if I'm lucky he does
kill someone and I get a little company! No of course I'm joking, I
wouldn't want anyone to die, I want to be let into Heaven alone. I don't
need some other jackass weighing me down being annoying while we're on
the escalator up. Do you go to heaven right after you die or do you have
to wait till the funeral? I guess we'll just have to wait and see!
2.26.2013
Why Should You Have Your Funeral at Night?
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