Why Doesn't Tony The Tiger Wear Pants?

Have you ever wondered why the CEO of Frosted Flakes Anthony Tigerschultz aka Tony the Tiger doesn't wear pants in his commercials? How is this acceptable behavior for a breakfast cereal representative? Sure the Trix Rabbit doesn't wear pants but he doesn't wear any clothes at all so it's excusable. Tony on the other hand wears a neckerchief. So we're establishing that in his world there are clothes and accessories to wear on your person, but he opens the closet in the morning and only reaches for a red ascot... That's a disturbing sign. If you're going to go naked, go hard or go home. No one should be naked while wearing a hat.

Tucan Sam doesn't wear any clothes, but he's a bird so that's fine. The Dig 'em Frog from Honey Smacks doesn't wear pants, but he wears a jacket and shirt long enough to reach down past his genitals. The problem with Tony the Tiger is that he's a tiger and tiger's genitals are well known for their aphrodisiac properties. You can't have a Tiger running out around kids with his tiger balls in people's faces. That is entirely unacceptable, I don't care how great Frosted Flakes are. Put some pants on that tiny legged son of a bitch!

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