I Am An Addict. I'm Addicted to Pooping.

One of the biggest addictions I have, and you might be the same way, is shitting. I can't stop doing it. I can go a week, week and a half but around that time I start going through withdrawal. I am a crap addict. I get all jittery and shakey, can't keep my mind straight and I just have to go into a public bathroom and light it up doggy style. Yeah that's right, you can also shit 'doggie style,' not many people know this. If you've ever seen a doberman pincher take a shit, make sure to jot down some notes, they aren't called pinchers for nothing.

Anyway, I keep trying to make a group called Poopaholics Anonymous, but the local High School keeps refusing to let me rent out their lunchroom on the weekends for meetings, I think they think it's something else. I just can't help it, it really affects my life negatively I mean it's so much fun and it feels so good! Of course sometimes you can go on bad shit trips and end up in a lot of pain and wake up on the toilet not remembering who you are, but that's part of the package. Shitting actually cost me my job at Pizza Hut. I can't really say anything more about it, but I'm not allowed within a 5 mile radius of the restaurant anymore. Poop addiction is a serious issue and I hope that by admitting I have a problem it will help others to get help too. We can all get through this together!

1 comment :

  1. Just be like Steve-O and pierce your butt closed. Problem solved.