The Top 5 Stupidest Phobias Ever

Most of the phobias people have are pretty dumb like the fear of dust (amathophobia) or the fear of ugly people (cacophobia), but at least those are somewhat logical. Dust is harmful to the human body, it's full of toxins and it's made of dirt from the outside and ugly people are often dangerous folks with nothing to lose, so you can see how those fears might be okay to have. Even that girl on "Maury" who's afraid of pickles has a point. Let's be honest, pickles look like wart covered Martian dicks. Who isn't at least a little creeped out by that? There are however many other phobias that are completely ridiculous that just shouldn't exist...


5). Fear of short words.

Sesquipedalophobia (or Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia) is the fear of long words and so if some people are afraid of long words, surely there are some people who are afraid of short words. The fear of short words is so rare it doesn't have a name, but it has to exist. Brevity is the soul of wit, not the soul of horror.


4). Fear of midgets.

Achondroplasiaphobia is the fear of "People with Achondroplasia" aka "Achondroplasiacs" aka "Dwarfs" aka "Short folks" aka "Down to Earth Individuals". I can't see why this is a fear. Of course you can't take midgets lightly (despite the fact most weigh under 90 lbs), but at the same time, when was the last time you heard of a dwarf killing someone? They're pretty much the most harmless people around. Giants and dwarfs tend to stay away from crime, it's all the assholes inbetween you have to watch out for.


3). Fear of defecation.

Rhypophobia is the fear of defecation. They may as well have a fear of breathing too. Defecating is a natural part of life, DEAL WITH IT!


2). Fear of kittens wearing thongs.

Kittythongaphobia. This is a fear I have and it's totally dumb, I know it. There's just something scary to me about a kitten wearing a thong. It's unnatural and the kittens get all angry at me and scratch. It's a lot more frightening than it sounds.

 1). Fear of not being afraid.

Contradictaphobia is when you're afraid of how you're not afraid of anything. It's a real condition that baffles psychiatrists to this day. The problem starts when you realize you have no fears, and so you actually become fearful about that, but at the same time you're not afraid of anything and that scares you. The only way to cure this is to find something else to be scared of and hope that breaks down the whole cycle non-fear, which is pretty damn stupid when you think about it.