The Best Way to Keep Your Bathroom Smelling Fresh AND Save Electricity!

Let's face it, bathrooms smell like human ass waste, but there are certain things you can do to keep your throne room from smelling like a sack of dead dogs. Some people like to put a clothespin on their nose to seal their nostrils shut, but that really doesn't do much good because your mouth can still taste the odors which is almost worse because the smells can still rise up through the back of the throat into your sinus cavity and still activate the gag reflex. Others still choose to use Glade or Febreze products. There's even those Glade things that you plug into an electrical outlet. How does that work? Why does it need electricity? Why are you wasting electricity to defeat the smell of your ass pudding when you could actually SAVE electricity and use CANDLES.

That's right, I typed "candles". Not candies. Candles. Those two words look very similar, but are two completely separate things. When people go into my bathroom they comment that it looks like a goddamn Satanist dungeon for ritualistic human sacrifices. They're probably commenting about the skulls, that has nothing to do with helping the odors I just like the way they look, they're souvenirs that were already dead when I bought them so relax.

I have dozens of candles lit around the clock to eat the methane gas released by people's asses. In addition to annihilating farts and turd smoke, they light the bathroom perfectly and because there's really nothing in a bathroom that can catch fire aside from towels (which I don't use) there's literally no fire hazard. It's the perfect solution to a horrible problem and I suggest you try it out yourself, as long as you don't have a lot of linens around or flammable wallpaper, but even then I mean what's going to happen, will your tub catch fire? Can that even happen? I don't know.

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