3.03.2013

The Top 5 Things You Should NEVER Put in a Piñata

Every party needs a pinata no matter what it is, Birthday, Christmas, St. Patrick's Day, World AIDS Day, etc. There must be a pinata involved to maximize the fun of the party. You want your pinata filling to be original because everyone's seen candy fly out of a papier-mache donkey before, but there are certain lines you shouldn't cross. Here are the top 5 pinata fillings you should never use:


5). Raw bacon.

The saying "Bacon makes everything better" really isn't true especially when it comes to clammy uncooked pork slices slapping you in the face after you smash a bacon pinata open. It's an especially bad idea to make a raw bacon pinata if you have a lot of dogs in your neighborhood, particularly pit bulls or rottweilers.


4). Hamsters, gerbils, mice, rats, and other assorted small rodents.
Kids love small rodents, but there are better ways to give them out at a party. Throw one in each goodie bag instead of stuffing a pinata full of them unless you want one of the hippie parents to get all up in your face about it.


3). A midget.

If you think it's a neat idea to cover a midget in rainbow paper mache and hang them from a tree you're wrong. It's not cool, it's disrespectful, and illegal too, apparently.


2). Fertilizer.

The only real benefit to putting fertilizer in your pinata is so when it breaks open over your yard it can make gardening a little easier, but that's really not worth being covered in crap and oh by the way, human feces carries harmful bacteria and viruses in it. You don't want any parents calling you up a week after the party to let you know they're suing you for giving their kid e-coli.


1). Hydrochloric Acid.

This might seem like a given, but you'd be surprised. Sometimes as a prank people will actually put large jars of hydrochloric acid in pinatas. That's why before you use a store-packed pinata you should open it up and make sure the filling is safe.



Of course there are a lot of other things you should never put in a pinata, but these are the ones I've had particularly negative experiences with and I hope you heed my warnings on this and have an awesome Good Friday.

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